Comforting Words
  • Home
  • Store
  • Blog
  • Author Bio
  • About
  • Media Room

Sympathy Thank You Notes Following a Death

8/3/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
An outpouring of support often follows a death. How do you acknowledge it?

It is common to receive support following a death. It often comes in the form of flowers, meals, or memorial donations, as well as the intangibles such as transportation for out of town loved ones or help, at the home, the hospital, or funeral home. In the days, weeks, and months after the funeral, do you need to acknowledge these kindnesses by writing a formal sympathy thank you note?

Funeral homes often supply the bereaved with note cards for this purpose. Sympathy thank you notes can be a simple acknowledgement or take the form of a longer letter. It’s very thoughtful to take the time to thank individuals who have made an effort to support you and remember your loved one. Many people find it therapeutic to write sympathy thank you notes and answer condolence letters and cards; it’s a chance to acknowledge someone’s thoughtful gestures and talk about the deceased. But some people are so overwhelmed with grief they’re just not up to the task.

I always felt it was important to write the notes and then I spoke with a grieving widow. She shared that every time she sat to write the notes she broke down in tears. She finally decided that this was a job she could not do. In another case, a bereaved daughter was unable to do much of anything in the six months after her father died. She was finally ready to tackle the thank you notes but wondered if it was too late.

It is never too late to acknowledge kindness but, people who cared enough about you and the deceased to support you in some way do not want to cause you any more pain so if you just can not bear to write the thank you notes, it is okay not to write them. Another alternative is to ask one or more of the friends or loved ones who offer assistance if they would help write the notes. It’s important to remember that no one who made the effort to comfort the bereaved did so expecting anything in return. No one wants to add an extra burden to someone grieving a loss.

​
Robbie Miller Kaplan is an author who writes from a unique perspective as a mother who has lost two children. She has written How to Say It When You Don't Know What to Say, a guide to help readers communicate effectively when those they care about experience loss, available in ebooks for "Illness & Death," "Suicide," "Miscarriage," "Death of a Child," "Death of a Stillborn or Newborn Baby," "Pet Loss," "Caregiver Responsibilities," "Divorce" and "Job Loss." All titles are in Amazon's Kindle Store.
​​​​​​

0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Categories

    All
    Anniversaries
    Belated Sympathy Note
    Bereaved Children
    Condolence Note
    Coping
    Death Of Baby
    Death Of Child
    Death Of Parent
    Facebook Condolences
    Funerals
    Grief
    Guest Book
    Help
    Holidays
    How To Help
    Illness
    Listening
    Memorials
    Memorial Services
    Miscarriage
    Mourning
    Pet Loss
    Social Media
    Suicide
    Sympathy Notes
    Thank You
    Visitation Etiquette
    What Not To Say
    What To Do
    What To Say

    Author

    Robbie’s goal is to help her readers communicate effectively when their loved ones, neighbors, colleagues, and community members face difficult times. 

    RSS Feed



Buy the Books
Book Store
e-Books
Picture
About Words That Comfort
About the site
Author Bio
Media Room

Contact


Robbie Miller Kaplan
wordsthathelp@gmail.com
© Robbie Miller Kaplan. All Rights Reserved.
All materials contained on this site are protected by United States copyright law and may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, displayed, published, broadcast, neither performed nor used to prepare published works, without the prior written permission of Robbie Miller Kaplan. You may not alter or remove any trademark, copyright, logo or other notice from copies of the content.

Photos used under Creative Commons from Pink Sherbet Photography, Gytha69, EatLiveGrowPaleo.com, Ralph Hockens, adamthomasjones, mikecogh, Mike Sinko, scotbot, davidmulder61, szabolor, quinn.anya, Kekka, “Caveman Chuck” Coker, mikecogh, "Stròlic Furlàn" - Davide Gabino, garryknight, elPadawan, jennaddenda, Parker Knight, fabienlej, francisco_osorio, Vilellic