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Timing your sympathy notes

6/11/2016

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When someone dies, our natural impulse is to immediately reach out and express our sympathy. Some of us can rise to the occasion and quickly craft a heartfelt condolence message. But if you need some time to do the job justice, take it. The bereaved get most attention in the early days and weeks, while they’re in shock and processing the loss, and most likely won’t remember much. It’s in the weeks and months ahead, when mourning takes place, that they might most appreciate a sympathy note from you. Here are five strategies for preparing notes of sympathy:

  1. Wait a day, a week, or a few weeks to digest the news and collect your thoughts before writing your note.
  2. Don’t do it all in one sitting.
  3. Draft your note first then edit, revise, and proof before writing your final note.
  4. Allow the note to sit for a day before mailing. Re-read it to ensure it reflects the true message you would like to convey.
  5. Include your address on the envelop to make it easy for the recipient to reach you, should they desire.

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    Robbie’s goal is to help her readers communicate effectively when their loved ones, neighbors, colleagues, and community members face difficult times. 

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